Besides being a truly awesome song, “Stop in the name of love” is something I’ve had to repeat to myself a lot lately.
I’ve found myself being very critical of other people for even the tiniest of things, and for what? Criticizing other people doesn’t make me feel any better about myself, so why do I act like it does?
“Those jeans really makes her stomach stick out. Gross.”
“Her makeup looks terrible! Learn how to blend.”
“Why would she think that outfit looks good?”
Do those sound familiar to anyone else? I feel like this mean-ness is almost second-nature to me, and I’m ashamed of that. Why is it that sometimes our first instinct to insult other people?
I think in a way our culture conditions us to think like this. “Trashy” reality TV shows exist to try to make us feel better about our lives, right? I’ve been guilty of this line of thinking for far too long, and it’s got to stop.
I’ve talked about how much I love Anastasia Amour before, and I really just can’t emphasize that enough. Recently she shared a guest post she wrote, and it resonated with me so much that I immediately started writing this blog post after I read it. She wrote about four different times she unfairly judged women based on their appearance and how she reacted when she learned the truth about each of the women.
I think pretty much everyone I know, male or female, will be able to relate to that post. We all have the little voice inside of us, telling us negative things about ourselves and others. That voice inside me is constantly going, and sometimes I admit defeat and let the voice run rampant for a while. I figure, what’s the harm if no one else can hear my thoughts?
But then I notice that the more I think negative thoughts, the more I keep on thinking negative thoughts. The more I let that negative inner voice keep going and going, the more unhappy I become with myself. Because even though no one else can hear those thoughts, it’s enough that I hear and consciously think them.
The next time you hear yourself thinking something negative about someone else, make yourself the subject of the insult. Does it hurt your feelings, even though you didn’t say anything out loud? Exactly.
There’s so much negativity around us already, every day, everywhere we go. Why would we want to contribute to that and keep that endless cycle going?
It’s not possible to preach and/or practice self-love while at the same time tear another human being down. It’s just not. This shaming needs to stop.
We need to stop. In the name of love, self-love, respect, admiration, basic human decency.